So I recently moved from the apartment I was renting to a house to rent as my girlfriend and I moved in together and she has a dog which wasn’t allowed in my old apartment. The day we move in we get a call from NPower about taking over the gas supply and I also arranged for them to take over the electric supply too, just for ease since I was already on the phone to them.
They explained how the electric would still be with British Gas (why it is called that when manned by India, more specifically Indians who can’t actually speak English, not even the script they have to read through, I will never know) for 4-6 weeks and I would have a final bill from British Gas to pay. All good, nothing hard about that… or is there?
Well, as it turns out, there is something hard about that. Apparently quite a lot is hard about that. So the first fuck up comes in the form of British Gas sending me a bill for £86 for less than 1 months electricity (February 12th – March 4th). Seems a little… high, but it gets better… this wasn’t the final bill, it was a REMINDER for the final bill. Well, I’d quite like the ACTUAL final bill before the reminder thanks. So I ring up British Gas and the fun begins…
Step 1: Enter reference code. Easy, hit a few buttons on the phone and speak to someone! Yay! Or not… See step 3.
Step 2: Voice authentication for my name. Apparently the voice detection system at British Gas is awesome. You say your name 3 times then spell it. But it’s also pretty pointless as seen in step 3.
Step 3: Speak to an Indian who can barely speak English.
Step 3a: Give them the surname their system just asked me for 3 times and then to spell it. Seriously? Why have this hassle if you aren’t going to supply it to the customer services dude!
Step 3b: Give them my reference code, that I gave them in step 1, because apparently they don’t push that through either…
Step 4: Try to piece together what the hell the Indian call centre is telling me, struggle – a lot, finally hear its NPowers fault.
Step 5: Ring NPower. Speak to someone English (YAY!) and hear that I need to supply British Gas with a meter reading… from a couple of weeks ago.
Step 6: Repeat steps 3-4 with someone who’s English is even worse, so bad they struggle to read their script…
Step 7: Get an English call centres number because the person in step 6 was useless and call them.
Step 8: Hear it is NPowers fault.
Step 9: Ring NPower, hear it is British Gas at fault.
Step 10: Ring British Gas, find out they are using a reading based off an estimate to generate the threat I’m calling about in the first place, an estimate that a month later I’m still not actually at… hence the retarded high bill. Find out I need to complain to NPower, again.
Step 11: NPower tell me its all good, just pay British Gas and they will only start billing me from the estimated number onwards.
Step 12: Ring British Gas to sort out the final bill.
Now surely step 12 is nice and simple, no? I mean all I need them to do is generate the final bill (not a reminder) in my name, post it, and I’ll pay it. Simple… or not.
So today, April 28th, I get a letter… from a debt collection agency, on behalf of the lovely British Gas.
Apparently they didn’t send a final bill, nor did they send a reminder bill, they simply went straight to a debt collecting agency. Hopefully this won’t affect my credit rating since at no point have I wanted to avoid paying my bill.
But I’d like to say a huge, heartfelt, loving thanks to British Gas. Thanks for being a complete shower of shits and a useless company.
I’m not one of the wankers who think since they are leaving a rental property they can simply avoid paying their final bills, I settled all those from my previous apartment. I’m not someone who dodges a bill at all, if it is my bill I’ll happily pay it. However in this one process of me trying to be honest and pay my bills the systems have failed between you, NPower and Royal Mail / TNT Post (please TNT Post, leave the mail delivery to Royal Mail) I now have a debt collection agency chasing me, possible damage to my credit rating, a general feeling of what the fuck?!?! and a loathe of your company and its (so far) many failings and flaws, but you don’t care about any of that, you’re just a shower of shits.